How I Spent My Sunday Going Ape

Can you guess the two best things about living in and around Philadelphia (aside from Cheesesteaks, Rocky, Water Ice, M.Night Shyamalan, a Rich Baseball tradition, Ben Franklin and a little thing like founding our country) ?

Firstly, Philadelphia and it's surrounding areas are a modern day cradle of craft beer, with artisan brewers such as Victory, Sly Fox, Yards, Nodding Head, Triumph, Dogfish Head and more within striking distance and all available in most local watering holes worth dropping your dime in.

The second gets to the heart of my Sunday. Philadelphia has it going on if your goings on happen to include horror and cult film screenings. Exhumed Films has been putting on awesome horror screenings at local theaters for the past fourteen years. Their shows have run the gamut from cannibals, to zombies, to slashers and ghouls. They've shown over 250 different films to date. Additionally, the Colonial Theatre, a 100+ year old gem famous for it's role in the 1958 Steve McQueen monster flick The Blob, has a monthly late night horror series dubbed First Friday Fright Night and has recent begun an additional series dedicated to cult, sci-fi and kung-Fu called Colonial Cult Cinema. As you can see, horror nerds are really never wanting for screenings to attend in and around the town.

It was a special program from the dudes at Exhumed Films that brought me to the International House on UPenn's campus this last day of July, to see all five original Planet of the Apes films in one go. Exhumed Films wanted us to Go Ape! Now, I remember being a kid and catching these five films on television all the time in the 80's, but I was too young to have attended any of the Fox Go Ape! shows in a theater. This was clearly a very personal show for Dan Fraga of Exhumed, who spoke very passionately about his Ape experiences as a child, so it was cool to see that he brought his young son, to pass on the Ape Law.

The films themselves I hadn't seen in quite a long time, with the exception of the first, Planet of the Apes, since the Colonial Theatre also ran a showing this month for First Friday Fright Night. Why all the showings? Well, a Fox imposed moratorium goes into effect today and lasts well into the foreseeable future with the impending theatrical (and then home video) release of Rise of the Planet of the Apes. So let's discuss the films themselves.

Planet of the Apes was a seminal film on release and became the beginning of an enormous marketing behemoth. It has been selected for preservation by the library of congress as historically or culturally significant. more than that, it's an excellent film, bringing to life a topsy-turvy world where ape is the dominant species and man is a dumb animal who can't talk. Charlton Heston stars as astronaut commander Taylor. He leads a crew of four on a long range deep space mission, which is accidentally thrown two thousand years into the future and crash lands on an alien planet, all while the crew is in cryogenic slumber. After the rest of the crew perishes in the ensuing adventures, Taylor is captured and brought to the ape city. It isn't long before it's discovered he can speak and a ideological struggle emerges between the intelligent chimpanzees who want to expand knowledge and the stubborn leader orangoutangs who won't allow any discovery which disagrees with the teachings passed down by the law giver, centuries before. The iconic ending, impactful, even forty years later, still gives me goosebumps and segues directly into the next film.

Beneath the Planet of the Apes begins right where it's predecessor leaves off, where Nova loses Taylor in an illusionary wall and we are introduced to a new astronaut, Brent, who is the last of a crashed rescue party sent to find the first crew but sadly caught in the same time distortion. Interestingly, the reason for adding a new lead character is because Heston did not was to do another Apes film but the studio wouldn't green light another without him. So he agreed to a small part at the beginning and end of the film only. Beneath deals with a war between the aggressive gorilla faction of the Ape society and the hidden remnant of intelligent humans who have taken refuge among the underground ruins of New York City. Ah but these humans are hideous mutants who possess mind control powers and worship a prewar doomsday bomb. As the film ends, Taylor detonates it, destroying the whole Earth. Brent's death seemed like a side note, which didn't seem fair since we spend the majority of the film with him, only to have him brushed aside and unceremoniously killed to make way for more Heston.

Escape from the Planet of the Apes takes up the story from there. But how can that be? I said the Earth was destroyed. Ah, it was, in the year 3955. Doctors Zira and Cornelius recovered Taylor's spaceship along with the help of another scientist ape and where able to escape just as Earth's life was ended. They were thrown backward through the same time vortex that brought the humans forward in time and arrive in our 1971. For most of this film, it's very much the Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home of the series, with very light hearted humor abound as the apes become the popular talk of the world. Well enough just can't be left alone(and this IS an Apes film) however, and a scummy government agent does everything he can to have the friendly chimpanzees and Zira's pregnancy eliminated. Some friendly help from circus owner Ricardo Montelban Armando allows their baby to secret survive the dreadfully out of place tragedy ending, thus setting up our next flick.

Ah Conquest of the Planet of the Apes! Where humans really show just how despicable we are as a species. It's now the distant utopian future of far off 1991, twenty years after the death of his parents, young Caesar, played by Roddy MacDowell who played his father Cornelius in all the other films save Beneath, is still being sheltered by Armando while all other apes have been made into abused slaves by human kind. After Armando sacrifices himself to cover up a public outburst by Caesar, the only ape who can speak sets about organizing his fellows toward bloody revolt. This climactic struggle continues in our last legitimate apes outing. It is interesting to see the roots of humans and apes coexisting with the relationship between Caesar and MacDonald, which continues in the next film.

Finally we finish this tale with Battle for the Planet of the Apes. Taking place decades after the revolt of the last film, the world has ended in a nuclear apocalypse. Caesar is still the leader of the apes, in their own city, but the leader of the war mongering gorillas is planning a coup. Meanwhile, irradiated humans find out about the ape city and launch an attack. There is quite a bit of post-apocalyptic killing, but in the end, Caesar uses his knowledge of the future not to make apes dominant, but to allow man and ape to coexist. We're left with a scene 600 years in the future, where they still do so.

I can't forget that in-between Escape and Conquest, we got a chance to watch two episodes of the Hannah-Barbara produced cash-in cartoon. To say it was hilariously bad is to not do justice to other legitimately laugh out loud bad toons from the 70's. It was absurd, badly animated and made no sense...which is why I'll be seeking it out on DVD this week.

In addition to the films, a noted Apes memorabilia collector put on an impressive, and I'd have to speculate expensive, display of Apes mania, props and costumes. If that was not enough, one of the door prizes was one of the highly coveted Mondo Planet of the Apes posters from the Alamo Draft House. This was a long, primate filled day, but I really do have to reiterate that all of these films still hold up and indeed each one of them was still really fun to watch, albeit each for different reasons. And so, I can say with complete certainty, that I have "Gone Ape!"

Special thanks to Midnight Cheese contributor Nick Lombardo for sharing these the photos for today's article. Nick's photographed the title screen for nearly every single Exhumed Films show since 1998.

The Trailer Dump, Issue no. 7

The Ice Pirates

• What a cast! John Carradine, Ron Pearlman, Angelica Huston and Robert Ulrich!
• The wide shots of the domed city is actually footage from Logan's Run.
• The sport the pirates watch over their lunch is footage from Rollerball.
• This is only Ron Pearlman's second film after A Quest for Fire.
• When I first subscribed to Netflix streaming, this is the first film I watched.

Galaxina

• Actress Dorothy Stratton, who played the titular (har har) Galaxina, was Playboy's Playmate of the year, 1980. Sadly, she was killed by her jealous husband in a murder/suicide. She was only 20.
• Laser sound effects were lifted right out of the original Battlestar Galactica tv show and shipboard door effects taken right from Star Trek.
• Received a Blu Ray release this past March as a double feature with Crater Lake Monster.

Ator, The Fighting Eagle

• This film contains a lot of O'Keeffe. How much O'Keeffe? Miles O'Keeffe. (sorry, couldn't help it)
• This is the first in a series of 4 films featuring Ator by occult director Joe D'Amato.
• The second film in the series was spoofed on Mystery Science Theater 3000 under it's American title, Cave Dwellers.

Until next time, here's hoping you spend Saturday night at the movies, who cares what you go and see.

Arrow Video: 'The Funhouse' Blu Ray Review

Sometimes you fall in love with a movie right away. Half way through it you just think to yourself “Sold! This DVD is already bought”. Other times it isn’t until later that night in bed or the next day, after the movie has settled that you realize you can’t shake it. Sometimes, however, it takes multiple viewings, over the course of many years, and then one time, in the right mindset, everything falls into place and a movie will just “click”.
Tobe Hooper’s The Funhouse was one of those movies for me. I had first picked up The Funhouse in 1992 from my favorite mom ‘n pop store, Reel Video. They were closing shop and selling off their inventory sans video boxes for $5 a pop. For my friends and me it was like finding One Eye Willie’s treasure as we made several trips a week and dug through the piles of dusty, old tapes. One sticky summer afternoon I picked up Summer Camp Nightmare and The Funhouse. After making the two mile bike ride back to my buddy’s house we popped it in the VCR. I enjoyed the film but it didn’t grab me the same way other favorite horror films of the era such as The Burning or Maniac had. I re-visited the film several times over the years via that well-worn VHS copy, then the Goodtimes DVD, and even two 35mm screenings. While I liked the film a lot I didn’t “love” it. It wasn’t until summer of 2006 while scanning my DVD rack for something to watch that I put it on again and it just clicked. Suddenly the movie just came alive for me—the rich carnival atmosphere, the odd characters, the unique monster and the mismatched group of early 80’s teens. It was like seeing the movie for the first time again, and along with Jaws it has become an annual summer must watch. Needless to say I was very excited when I heard Arrow Video would be releasing this in high definition blu ray in July.
If you have been following the UK’s Arrow Video than you know they have brought back the excitement of genre releases. I haven’t savored this type of anticipation since 1999-2001 era Anchor Bay. When I see Arrow has acquired a title I love, I know I am are going to get a release put together with care and brimming with extras. This release of The Funhouse is no different. The transfer is a definite upgrade from the previous Universal disc and in my opinion it even gives a lot of Arrow’s previous blu ray releases a run for their money. Presented in its original 2.35:1 aspect ratio the picture is gorgeous, colors pop, the image is sharp and the grain is properly textured and film-like. Blacks are solid with no crushing. Beautiful.
It is in the bonus content where this release really shines. The previous Universal DVD’s sole extra was a theatrical trailer. Here we are treated to a bevy of extras including three audio commentaries (one with make-up artist Craig Reardon and Jeffery Reddick, one with the film’s producer Derek Power and one with Arrow’s own Calum Waddell and Justin Kerswell whose commentary is a very informative one on both The Funhouse and the 80’s horror genre in general), a 2004 era Q & A session with Hooper, interviews with Hooper, Mick Garris, Miles Chapin, an expansive behind the scenes still gallery, and the original trailer, even though it is not listed on the packaging. Yet again Arrow also includes the option of four different cover choices, a fold-out poster and collector booklet, all nicely housed in a window box slip cover. It should be noted that despite this release being listed as “region free” a number of the extras will not play on Sony Blu Ray players. But don’t let this discourage you, it is still worth the purchase or upgrade for the fantastic high-definition transfer and commentaries alone.
All in all Arrow has done a bang up job with this highly enjoyable and underappreciated gem of a film from one of horrors arguably greatest eras.

Late Night Double Feature Picture Shows

Ah the double feature, that wonderful staple of drive-ins and late night horror/scifi programming. Like many of the topics brought up here on the Midnight Cheese, double features are a lost art in many ways. Luckily the folks at Shout! Factory remember them and know how to put together a great DVD experience. On a whim, I snagged The Evil and Twice Dead together as a double feature, a part of the Roger Corman's Cult Classic series. I popped open a brew and greedily tore the cellophane armor from the case, then stretched out on the couch to enjoy a night of low budget horror.

Let's start there, with the cover: it sets the mood, depicting the brick wall of an 80's second run theater, with the one sheet posters plastered up very slap-dash. I don't know about you but for me the little things like this really make the over all experience that much more satisfying. Which is why when the menu loaded, I actually giggled a little. Where I was expecting a selection menu with just the titles of both films to select, I was instead treated with the visage of an old, neoned to the nines, movie house frontage. By selecting the ticket, a classic style "admit one" type ticket, you advance into the theatre. The lobby looks like exactly what you would expect to find in a place that would show a double billing of The Evil and Twice Dead. There's a snack bar on the left, by selecting that, you're given access to the scene selection menu. Similarly the rest room door on the right grants you access to the special features, not too much here beyond director commentaries and an interview with Jill Whitlow, who played Robin in Twice Dead. Interestingly she was also in Swamp Thing and Night of the Creeps, and she has some fascinating thoughts to share. The main attraction, though, is obviously the double doors at the center of the lobby. They lead into the theaters and kick off our double feature. However before we get our 'Cheese on, we're given the choice of just selecting one of the films or the "Roger Corman Experience". Sounds awesome, right? It totally is. By selecting it, both films play straight on through. But more than that, we're treated to a fully programed theater double feature experience. There are 70's bumpers announcing the upcoming attractions, several exploitation trailers, even a snack bar solicitation and there's more of them between the films.

Got your popcorn? Good. The show is underway. First up, we've got The Evil, which is the story of a doctor, Richard Crenna of Rambo fame, who purchase an enormous old mansion, which he plans to open as a drug rehabilitation clinic, with the help of his friends. So they set about cleaning up this long abandoned, built on cursed Native American land, monument to horror film set location. And wouldn't you know, before long one of our intrepid protagonists accidentally unleashes the titular evil. It's a little bit ghostly mansion, a couple parts demonic spirit with a few sprinkles of the eternal struggle between good and evil thrown in for good measure. It all works out in the end, if you believe in the standard 80% attrition rate, which I do. This is a pretty interesting movie, nothing special. It's exactly what you'd expect from double feature fodder.

After some more trailers and an enticement to procure more noshables from the united snack bar of your kitchen, our second feature kicks in. Twice Dead is the tale of an east coast family who inherits a mansion in L.A. Formerly the mansion belonged to a famous Hollywood actor, who lost his love and hung himself. Unfortunately it's now the haunt of a stereotypical late 80's, early 90's gang of punks. They resent being ejected from their hang out and begin a campaign of harassment against the family kids. There's a few problems here, but mostly the issue is that Twice Dead is schizophrenic; it doesn't know if it's a ghost story or if it's a gang revenge tale. It's both, kind of. It's also very made for TVish, very Saturday afternoon matinee. It isn't as strong as The Evil but it's also a taste of nostalgia for me, recalling USA Up All Night, which needs to come back (damnit).

It's obvious that Shout! Factory put some honest effort into the presentation here and if, like me, you pine for the schlock of yesteryear, check out this double feature DVD.