As some of you may know, I help select and host repertory cult and horror film showings at the humblingly atmospheric Colonial Theatre in Phoenixville, PA. If you're unfamiliar with this spectacular venue, the Colonial is famously remembered as the theater featured in the 1958 Steve McQueen horror flick The Blob, which they gloriously celebrate each year with a weekend festival dubbed "Blobfest". As you can imagine, it's the perfect local for a monthly late night horror show, which was started in mid-2008 by then local cinofile, Bob Trate. First Friday Fright Night (FFFN) has been an enormous draw for the theater and has been going strong for the past three years.
I've been a rabid attendee since I first heard about it prior to their 3rd show, a 35mm print of the immensely popular Evil Dead, in June '08. In July 2010 I began hosting a bimonthly showing of Mystery Science Theater 3000 episodes which was not my first hosting duty at the Colonial but has grown to be my favorite (I love coming up with absurd, embarrassing and fun contests for the pre-show prizes!).
I'm bringing this up because it would become the jumping off point for an entirely separate cult film series (Colonial Cult Cinema) in the middle of this past year (which we'll discuss to in part 2 of this retrospective).
And so it's with all this in mind that I'd like to take a look back at all the cult and horror which has been lovingly showcased at the Colonial Theatre in 2011. Consider this my own "end of year list".
January
Dark City - Ah Dark City! Such a fantastic work, summoning qualities both noir and scifi then painting with a brush of gothic mystery- this flick is an amazing ride which didn't get the recognition it deserved upon release in 1998. The director's cut was screened on Blu-Ray, since there isn't a 35mm print of this version.
MST3K episode #813 "Jack Frost" - This Mike episode centers on lambasting a badly translated dub of what appears to be a beautifully shot Russo-Finnish fairy tale piece. As is typical of all the MST3K shows which I host, there was a pre-show contest for prizes. In this case, I held a "Ricochet-off", where those brave souls who joined me on stage had to out "Ricochet!" each other in the manner of Mike's invention from the Starfighters episode.
February
The Fifth Element - I adore this film. It's marvelous scifi never feels forced and all parts humor and action are as tightly woven strands, marking this as a crowd pleaser that holds up very well. And I'll just throw this out there: Chris Tucker at his absolute best.
March
In the Mouth of Madness - Our first true horror film of the year is commonly held, as host Bob Trate noted at the time, to be the last "good" John Carpenter film (I disagree, but we'll table that until another time). Drawing heavily from H.P. Lovecraft's body of work, we're treated to that special sort of madness which lies outside the limits of man's mortal bounds. Sam Neill turns in an amazing performance.
MST3K episode #417 "Crash of the Moons" - This wonderful episode contains exactly what I always think of when conjuring images of what MST3K means for me: Black and White 50's science fiction with cardboard sets and campy premise. Sure there are better episodes out there, but I dearly love the fun Joel and the bots' have with the adventures of space ranger Rocky Jones. Before the show our contest was an honest to goodness invention exchange. As I recall, the winner created the "Nerdvent Calendar" - in homage to both Advent calendars (with little gifts contained in each day) and all things geek leading up to Blobfest itself. Marvelous!
April
The Terminator - Our third scifi film of the year in the Fright Night spot is a true classic, catapulting it's director James Cameron and star Michael Biehn Arnold Schwarzenegger on to super stardom. Even better, the 35mm print was very clear and well preserved!
May
Maniac - This was an experience, more than just a screening. We were able to showcase a brand new 35mm print of this niche classic. If that wasn't cool enough, we had director William Lustig on hand. He both introduced the film and stuck around for an incredibly informative question and answer session at the conclusion (moderated by cohost to be Joel Rickenbach of You've Got Geek podcast fame). Even more fun for us was the chance to have dinner with Bill Lustig before the show. He was pleasant company and quite the affable chap! Hopefully he'll come back this year for Blobfest (he was floored when he found out he was hosting his movie at "The Blob theater"!)
MST3K episode #1008 "Final Justice" - This Joe Don Baker stinker is perfect fodder which we punctuated with a preshow Cowboy and/or JDB costume contest. Thankfully, no one dressed as Joe Don.
June
The Adventures of Buckaroo Banzi across the 8th Dimension - Which is more an impossible situation? For me to do this film justice in simple text form or for you to never have seen it? This amazing original film works so many angles, you might think you're being taken in by some nefarious con. You are being taken for a ride, but you aren't being grifted out of anything but your ignorance. Topping off my first chance to see this gem in 35mm was a showcase of props and collectibles on display thanks to Film Buff Online writer (and dear friend), Rich Drees.
There you have it, part one of our year in repertory review for the Colonial Theatre. Look for part two coming shortly, detailing the changing of the guard that took place and how the Colonial Cult Cinema night took shape.
I've got a few ideas tumbling around in my think-matter and these trailers were conspirators to steal my concentration (such as it is). I'm starting you off today with a taste of that which is lost and missed very dearly- late night horror hosts. So enjoy the opening to The Vampira Show followed by a smattering of trailers as variable as my tastes seem to be.
Let's chat about zombie defense armor. No, seriously. Let's really delve in to what onionic layers would best keep your tender vittles from the craven jaws of the dead.
I've had this discussion with my friends numerous times. Many of them have not read Max Brooks' seminal work, The Zombie Survival Guide: Complete Protection from the Living Dead, and that'll probably bite them in the ass (or hand or wrist or neck; anywhere lovingly exposed to wretched death breath). Certainly this book is not the end point of zombie survival discussion, but it is the jumping off point for trendy, informed discussion salons around town. I highly recommend it if for no other reason than that it systematically dismisses many of the mind numbingly stupid ideas which we've been conditioned to think would be effective against the dead who walk. (Shotguns? Seriously, we still think they're the best way to go?)
The word armor conjures up idyllic images of a medieval knight, resplendent in shining armor astride a mighty steed. More like Spam in a can on top of an appetizer to unending hordes of blood mad undead. Consider that all armor designs throughout human history were crafted to protect one man from excruciating pain long enough for them to inflict it on someone else, thus disabling the other from continuing to attack them. As zombies feel no pain, it makes no sense to make that the basis of your conceptual apocalypse armor. Your main concerns should be durability, bite resistance, availability and maneuverability.
So let's suit up. Starting from the inside out, you're going to want anti-microbial underwear. It's a zombie apocalypse, who knows when next you'll be able to change your most personal of garments when you don't even do it daily now! Over that you'll want loose fit, boot cut denim jeans. Skinny jeans are just begging for a crushed nut whilst fleeing (and you're going to need to repeople the earth eventually). Avoid pre-distressed styles - they're going to get fucked up enough over time without giving in to foolish fashions (which are more like feeding holes to happy zombies).
And, of course, you're going to want a sturdy pair of hiking boots. I know you're thinking steel toed work boots would be boss but consider this: have you have had to walk for twelve hours in steel toed work boots? It sucks. Hiking boots are designed for all manner of conditions and for you to be in them all day.
Shirt choice is up to you, really. We recommend something that wicks sweat but vintage tee's are obviously cooler to be found reanimated and walking around in. You'll provide a great comic relief moment as the director pans across zombie you in your XXXL "Make 7/Up Yours" t-shirt.
Next up is the meat to keep your meat safe, actual armor pieces. You're going to want the lightest material you can find that's going to resist bites. For that you want motocross armor. It's incredibly strong composite plastic construction repels lethal infections with great ease and it's available at most sporting goods stores. Not the chest piece though, we'll get to coverage there in a moment. You want the arm to elbow and the knee to ankle coverage afforded by these (now) wonder materials. Since the wrists and hands are highly vulnerable areas, especially when engaged in CQZC (Close quarters zombie combat), It's advisable to wear thin, fitted leather gloves as well, preferable ones that cover to the elbow. You can usually find these in a....
...Leather jacket store: Where you can acquire a motorcycle style leather jacket. Why this style? A fitted, button up neck may just save you from the dreaded corroded dinner bell bite (as in: ring-a-ding-ding, this warm meat sack is going down). This style is also more fitted, giving zombies more trouble in grabbing hold of you and pulling you down to your doom.
So there you have it. High mobility, great durability, near complete bite protection from components which are easily available in most places. The jury is still out on best head wear. A cycle helmet or a riot helmet would seem to grant the most protection but at great cost: vastly diminished hearing. Perhaps it's time to determine the bite resistance of neoprene head socks....
In the unlikeliest of circumstances, you are about to find yourself trapped in a horror film. Since we're already accepting this strange scenario, let's take it one step further and examine the anatomy of survival. Here's the setup: you're in your home, alone. It's night time and you have no phone or computer or if you do they won't work anyway. Through the intervention of some higher power (the writer) you've gleaned knowledge of the future. In but five minutes' time, your movie scenes begin rolling. What preparations will you make to ensure your survival?
Today's featured sub genre is Slashers; that delightful ballet of creatively crafted kills, titillating teenage tender bits and men-come unstoppable killing machines. Here's what I'd do in my five minutes.
Break all of the mirrors - In everyday life, we utilize mirrors to assure ourselves we've configured our look correctly. In slasher flicks, however, they're an irresistible compulsion for film makers to cram in a brutal surprise attack. So, let's remove one of the cheap ways for the screen writer to slaughter me.
Disguise the circuit breaker box and power lines - Cutting the power is another slasher film technique that puts the audience on edge and makes it easier for the killer to approach for a surprise kill. Remove that power from their iron grasp: disguise the area where power lines enter the house in a Christmas lights display. Sure, it might be the middle of July, but which is worse: neighbors calling you tacky because of a holiday taboo or neighbors calling you tacky because they're standing in your congealed blood? Also construct a false wall in front of the fuse box ala Dawn of the Dead.
Eat high fiber cereal - Yet another cinematographic trick, usually cheaply employed in an attempted jump scare, is setting the camera extra close to the victim. This somehow shortens their view to a mere three feet, allowing an enormous monstrosity of meat and blades to be kissably closer than is otherwise possible. With a boat load of fiber in your system, you should be ready to cloud the air around you with noxious flatulence, pushing the camera man back several feet and giving your self several more precious seconds of reaction time.
Separate out your car key and place it in your pocket - When making your eventual wounded flight to the car, you've no time to fumble through a keyring full of metal. That gives your nemesis more time to yank your head off like a paper towel. So take that all important car key off the ring and place it in your dominant hand side pocket. As an added bonus, you won't fall on all your keys when taking inevitable tumbles whilst being pursued.
And that's about my five minutes. It's do or die time now. How would you spend your five preparatory minutes?
Today's taste of trailer torture comes courtesy of Hammer Films. As you might recalled, I'm exploring my Hammer Horror Blind Spot. As with ,any contemporary trailers, the voice over work is powerful and inspires dread, even if the outlandish claims may not hold true for audiences of today.
With the home release fate of our favorite cow-town puppet show in the loving care of Shout! Factory, fans of Mystery Science Theater 3000 have been enjoying consistent, rapid fire releases loaded with excellent and interesting special features. This year alone, we've had four major releases: three box sets and a special two disc edition of the Manos: The Hands of Fate. Shout! has also been awesome enough to produce eight reprints of episodes released in previous box sets by Rhino, which are now out of print. Admittedly, these reprints are bare bones in nature, but for those who missed out on the now unavailable box sets for whatever reason, these are a great way to acquire official version of these much loved episodes.
We haven't had it this good since the hay day of Comedy Central, giving us annual Turkey Day marathons. If you're a true MSTie, you won't require any convincing from the likes of me. Instead, please consider this more a list of the best 5 things about this most recent of box sets, tendered reverently from Shout! Factory's hands into your waiting mandibles for consumption.
Quickly, before we jump into your waiting maw of doom, here are the four episodes featured in this set (in case you suck at Amazon.com):
-306: Time of the Apes - A Japanese tv series attempting to cash in on the American Apes mania of the time, truncated into a crummy, nonsensical flick.
-314: Mighty Jack - Mish-mash of episodes five and six of a Japanese tv show set aboard a flying submarine that gently banks from side to side.
-610: The Violent Years - Despite it's violence, this is a truly boring entry in the "teenagers in rebellion sub genre". The overly long preceding short(Young Man's Fancy) is actually more entertaining and better riffed than the main attraction.
-702: The Brute Man - The final performance of Rando Hatton, who's disfigurement lead to him playing the rough thug in many films. Here he's "The Creeper", a shadowed monster who steals in order to fund the surgery of a blind woman he loves.
If you're looking for five hundred words each on episodes you've probably seen a dozen times, I'm certain any number of other reviewers of this set can hook you up. Now let's get to the good stuff.
1. More Sandy Frank episodes!
Sandy Frank is best known for importing (and hilariously poorly dubbing) the Gamera films and several Japanese TV shows and films to the American market. No less than eleven of these Sandy Frank imports were riffed as episodes for MST3K and on many occasions the mockery extended beyond the meterial to teasing the film distributor himself. This perceived animosity had led to the belief that all 11 Sandy Frank episodes would never see home release. A myth dispelled like so much Gamera flatulence with Shout! Factory's special five disc set revolving around the giant friend of children turtle monster in July. MST3K Box Set 22 contains two Sandy Frank episodes: Mighty Jack and Time of the Apes. Keep your fingers crossed that the two Fugitive Alien episodes are forth coming as they're excellent.
2. The Making of MST3K (1997)
This, the second such special, has an unfair advantage over it's predecessor: It isn't narrated by the hated (by MSTies far and wide) Penn Gillett. Twenty-five minutes in running time, this special was filmed during season 8 and features some awesome insights from the cast and crew (much of which you likely already know from years of scouring the Internet, but still, it's great to get an official release of this). Mike and the bots riff the behind the scenes footage itself, as you'd expect them to, and the history of the show up to that point is illuminated for your personal edification.
3. Four new mini posters from Steve Vance
As with all of the Shout! Factory releases, artist Steve Vance graces us with his interpretation of Servo and Crow taking on the episode in question. While they're also on the individual DVD's display cases, it's always awesome to receive them bundled in as separate posters too. This time around, it really feels like Mr.Vance stepped up his game in an effort to include more details and action in the background. Kudos to him; I love these little posters.
4. The DVD Menus of MST3K
Hopefully you've spied with you little eyes the steady evolution of the DVD menus from static images accompanied by music from the film being riffed? Surely you've noticed that the menus themselves are now entertaining short form comedy in their own right with 3d renderings of Tom, Crow and the SOL? This fascinating extra takes you behind the propulsion pushing it forward. A man - in point of fact - not a fuel source as such. This extra gives a detailed glimpse behind that creative process.
5. Turn Down your Lights were applicable
This prompt would be seen just prior to the theme song for each episode of the show from the first episode of season 2 (201 - Rocketship XM) through the fourth episode of season four (404 - Teenagers from Outer Space) but had been noticeably absent from most of the home video releases (It was included on the previous set as all five Gamera episodes began with it). Shout! Factory has again listened to the MSTie outcry and has included it on both Sandy Frank episodes, allowing these episodes to begin as they're supposed to!
As always, Shout! Factory takes the ball and (insert relevant sports metaphor here- depending on the ball taken). They Rule. There's more special features I didn't mention including: an introduction to The Brute Man by Mary Jo, introductions to Might Jack and Time of the Apes by Japanese cinophile August Ragone, Ed-ucation: Archival Interviews with Delores Fuller and Kathy Wood and the MST Hour Wraps for Time of the Apes.
The only thing missing is an announcement detailing the next set's episodes! God it feels good to be a MSTie.
In the middle to late 90's, if you told me that we'd have a massive cultural zombie renaissance and accompanying weary-some glut, I'd have told you to fuck off and to go hide in the basement with the mouthy white guy, his abused wife and their soon to be reanimated, garden tool loving daughter. Nevertheless here we are and you've never had more choice chomps for your undead delights. Unfortunately for every new, interesting take on rotters, there's a dozen others that are just looking to cash in on the craze. Hopefully you didn't skip Pontypool.
The title, perhaps it's weakest point, is the reason that I almost passed it over. It's entirely unassuming, just like the film, and so it makes sense in the rear view but does a disservice as an initial hook. The title of the film comes from the name of the Canadian town in which it takes place. It's a small community afflicted by the bitter Ontario winters. We're following recent fired radio shock jock Grant Mazzie, who's on his way to the only gig he could get- morning news man on small town Pontypool's only station. Mazzie is brilliantly played by Stephen McHattie, whom I absolutely loved as Hollis Mason in Watchmen; especially in his last stand scene in the Extended version (arguably on of the best moments of the whole film). Grant is smooth and charismatic, which is absolutely essential in a character driven film with a single set.
That's right, outside of the opening sequence the entire film takes place in the radio studio populated by only three characters- Grant, his producer Sydney and Laural-Ann the tech. Because they are the main source of news for a small town and because they're precisely positioned to intersect the incoming information, we're introduced to the madness of an outbreak in such a unique way: without eyes or even first hand account. It's tension times ten as all accounts of the hysteria are unconfirmable, with discomfort building on top of itself as call ins end in grotesque screams and with confusing mental hooks. The source of the outbreak might be the most unique ever attempted...but I'll stop right there.
I can't delve further into why Pontypool is such a unique entry into my favorite genre without completely spoiling what makes it so effective for you. This is a flick which zombie fans absolutely cannot afford to pass up, even if you've grown fatigued of the en vogue sugenre. It's so refreshing that it might even wipe some of that fatigue away. The atmosphere sucks you in and the story hooks dig themselves in deeper than an Alabama tick. I'd be fascinated to hear what other zombie fans think of this work. Drop me a line after you see it. It's currently available on Netflix Instant watch.
If I could quantify my love for new, fascinating films dropping into my Netflix instant queue, I'd need a disproportionately large measurement system. I wonder if I could rent the deck of an aircraft carrier? What's the going rate? It should take an enormous scaling to dish up the delightful cinematic ideas coming out of Norway. If your gore soaked funny bones weren't tickled by Dead Snow (which they should have been, rewatch it noob), then allow Norwegian film making to win you over with the dark fantasy, Troll Hunter.
Love the poster art
Heavily steeped in folklore, Troll Hunter never treats the titular monsters as such. Instead, we're introduced to them by a documentary crew following a government sponsored agent, Hans the Troll Hunter (Otto Jespersen, who is FANTASTIC). Hans is a tired, disgruntled employee who decides to expose the long kept government secret because he's underpaid and sick of government bureaucratics. He's a blue collar worker doing a thankless job which would be extraordinary to anyone else, but to him is simply another day-another dollar. In that sense, he's got a lot of the appeal of Hellboy (my favorite comic book character), minus some of the more overt comedy. For me, Hans makes this film what it is. His weapons and his methods are akin to that of an exterminator, methodically readying specialized equipment to deal with specific variants of pests. (I could also draw parallels to James Woods in John Carpenter's Vampires, but I don't want to call down the slings of arrows of outrageous 'net trolls.)
Our Hero: Hans
The Trolls themselves are thoroughly fleshed out, both scientifically and through associated folklore. There are different subspecies, their traditionally depicted abilities and vulnerabilities are given scientific explanations and they are confirmed as mammals, at one point, by a veterinarian whom Hans consults. Their haunts, behaviors and even physical oddities are cataloged and either exploited or defended against. It's intriguing. It sucks in the part of your brain which is always actively scanning to explain the dark parts of our world and our cultural imagination.
Set in and around Norway, we're treated to amazing vistas - the likes of which draw to mind scenes from Peter Jackson's Lord of the Rings trilogy. Waterfalls, mountains, green hills and frozen tundra are all fleetingly seen. Here is where I need to detail my only detractions from what is an otherwise fantastic film. To this point I haven't mentioned the cinematic style or over arching frame work of the story. That's because Troll Hunter is a found footage film. We're viewing through the eyes of an aspiring(and yawningly uninteresting) documentary crew, yearning to drag the mythological trolls screaming into the light of day. Why bring this up while speaking about the beauty of the Norwegian landscape? Because the herky-jerky nature of being a found footage film means the vistas were only glanced at, sideways with a camera sitting on a lap pointed out a window.
Indeed the parkinson's fueled cinematics lend difficulty to following along with the subtitles, which normally become second nature to viewers within a few minutes. I will admit bias on my part- I've grown very tired of the found footage motif. I'd have much preferred this be a traditionally shot piece of motion picture fantasy. It's not enough to ruin viewing experience - but I'd be remiss not to dock it a few cool beans for wearing the well used garb of a trend I'd like to see fade (mostly) away.
Troll Hunter is very awesome. It's a cinematic treat and well worth seeking out. It's apparently already on the fast track for an "Americanization" (since 90% of Americans are lazy fucks unwilling to see a subtitled film) - but it's destined to fail if it doesn't star Otto Jespersen. Chris Columbus had better hope Otto speaks English.
As I settled in to watch my new copy of 1973's 'The Cheerleaders', an excellent double disc release from Arrow, a few things became abundantly clear. Firstly, this silly teenage sex comedy toes the thin line between softcore and hardcore in it's depiction of how we all imagine real cheerleaders actually behave (still got my fingers crossed there) and secondly it's also from quite another place and time entirely. Likely made for the drive-in market ("daddy, what's a drive-in?"), this delightfully campy, low budget, raunchy comedy doesn't quite click like I can tell it should. Perhaps I shouldn't have watched it by myself; it does seem like the kind of flick which is best enjoyed with company. This, of course, led my brain to the following train of thought: What would someone walking in on me watching this by my lonesome think?
And there are plenty of activities which you could participate in that would amplify the potential embarrassment you may experience. I've cataloged a few for you; consider this both a warning as well as a dare.
Five Things you shouldn't be caught doing while watching The Cheerleaders
Don't Eat Hot Dogs - This should be pretty obvious. Wrapping your sweaty, mustachioed maw around a cylindrical meat stick whist watching softcore 70's sex comedies just might garner you some funny looks.
Don't Fish Around in your Pocket for Loose Change - because that really isn't watch you're doing. Besides, what the hell are you carrying hard currency for? That's so the 00's.
Don't Polish your Glass Rod Collection - Look, I know that they've been gathering dust but resist all impulses to stroke your glass shafts with impunity, Gandalf Greyhame.
Don't Pet your Pussy - As enjoyable and warming as it would be to have a puring pussy in your lap whist viewing The Cheerleaders, think about how startled that kitty will be when your littler horror fan is aroused by the on screen antics.
Don't Rub One Out - My god! Are you even paying attention to the plot?
Usually, when I hear "stuffing", my mind flashes directly to any number of horrific scenes of gore filled madness. Below two trailers for Thanksgiving horror films, one which I can't believe got a budget and one that desperately needs to be made.Enjoy these and your turkey day.
Oh boy do I loves me some cheesy trailers. The menacing voice over, the focus on action, one liners, scares and nudity. It's a whole 80 minute bad movie with the 50 boring minutes having been stripped out, leaving us with a bombastically edited look at the remaining awesome bits, made from concentrate. Enjoy.
Do you have a horror blind spot? Is there a specific subgenre from which you remain blissfully ignorant? Perhaps there’s an auteur director who’s first film you hated and you’ve subsequently steered clear of her works. Maybe you’re among the younger set, an ever changing demographic, and have never had the chance to experience something special. I think it’s not unreasonable to postulate that most horror nerds have a blind spot of one sort or another (except for Nick Lombardo, perhaps), though most of them are ashamed to admit it.
Should there be shame attached to this omission in horror film experience though? I say no, so long as once a deficiency is recognized, the nerd in question makes efforts to illuminate themselves of this darkest cinema genre. Take this as a blessing in disguise, not a scarlet letter. Who among us wouldn’t give their collection of severed heads to experience a genre classic newly, for the first time? You can’t go home again, but in this case you can visit a place you’ve never even vacationed (or possibly seen postcards of) before.
I have a horror genre blind spot. It isn’t a minor blemish such has having never seen Uwe Boll’s House of the Dead (I have). No, this spot is glaring, obvious and marginally painful to think about. I’m going to pen a series of articles regaling you with my adventures in casting light into this hole. What is my horror blind spot? (Don’t cringe) It’s the Hammer Horror Films catalogue.
I know. I KNOW. It isn’t as though I’ve never seen any Hammer Horror films. I certainly have. However it’s been years, so many that I’ve got a foggy cloud in my head where those recollections should be. I know that I’m missing out. It’s with that in mind that I’ve borrowed a smattering of Hammer titles from Joel of the eminent podcast - You’ve Got Geek. From his guiding hand, I’ll be experiencing the joys of these gothic marvels for the first time.
Last evening, I began my journey with the 1970 favorite Scars of Dracula. Marking the fourth time that YEAR which Christopher Lee would portray the prince of darkness, Scars of Dracula features enormous atmosphere and styling, as it seems all Hammer period films seem to overflow with. Our tale it's fairly straightforward: Angry villagers, having grown weary of their pretty virginal girls being sucked dry by the Count, attack his castle with pitchforks and torches. They burn the inner workings of castle Dracula through and through, though this means nothing as in a brilliant stroke of forethought the Count's chamber is stone on all sides, built into a cliff face and only accessible via a window above a titanic drop to rocks and sea below.
So, aside from blowing their torch and gunpowder load, the villagers accomplish nothing aside from sparking the anger of one very powerful prince of darkness. Lee exacts his furious vengeance on the womenfolk of sleepy village, driving the men to drink (more than normal) and causing them to be completely standoffish to all travelers. Of course we're then introduced to a young womanizing playboy, who pisses off the daughter of the local town judge and is falsely accused of rape. On the run from the law, our fun loving pal is kicked out of the village inn and having no recourse, he spends the night at Castle Dracula. It's all excellently creepy and done in elaborate style.
Lee is wonderful in the role which he had already become famous for and over which he had already grown quite weary. The gore was ratcheted up above what were normal Hammer standards, in order to compete with American films that brought more bloody messes to the table in the wake of Romero's Night of the Living Dead. The vivid colors pay off and contribute to a sort of faux gore style that's simultaneous gruesome and fancifully stylish. The lovely ladies showcased in the buff are delightful to look upon and contribute, in their own special way, to enlarging the plot's thickness. (*drumroll*).
The Scars of Dracula is a fantastic take on the Dracula mythos, a marvelous period piece and very well made. The Pal region DVD I watched looked great (for DVD with upscaling) though I would very much love to see a high fidelity Blu-Ray version, since the colors would render even more vividly. This was a great first choice to slip into something more comfortable of yesterday. Stay tuned as I continue to illuminate my own personal horror blind spot. Use the comments to tell me what your particular short coming might be.
Wow, let me just take a moment here before beginning. It's refreshing to not start an article with the "31 Days of Halloween" preface. You should understand that it isn't that I didn't enjoy writing that series, it's simply that it IS an endurance run. I capped off my month long celebration of all things Halloween by attending the annual Exhumed Films 24 Hour Horrorthon. This is the fifth incarnation of the 'Thon, of which I've attended all but one (I missed the 3rd year, in 2009). As a long time Exhumed Films goer, I look forward to this event all year long. (the first show I attended was the All Night Italian horrorfest at the now defunct Hoyt's on October 20th, 2000)
The truth is that the Exhumed crew always puts on an elaborate production, from the pre-show announcements and prizes, to wallet emptying horror merchandise enticement and general feel of hanging out with friends. It's a marvelous atmosphere to feel included in. I can't make every show, but I try my hardest- even when it might not features films which I necessarily love or am intimately familiar with- because it's not 100% about what you're seeing but also how you're seeing it and whom you're seeing it with.
Before I showcase the shock and awe blasted into my brain from this weekend's Horrorthon (and with which I am still working to congeal into something more linear), I'd like to discuss that last point in a little more detail. Normally, all Horrothon films are kept an absolute secret right up until the moment that they unspool on screen before hungry eyes. This year there was a break from tradition. Exhumed Films announced that the Philadelphia premier of the new, shot in Africa, zombie film The Dead would take place during their largest event of the year. During the preshow announcements, we were informed that the distributor of the film decided not to even strike ANY 35mm prints, deciding instead to go with digital distribution only. Understandably, this was met with some displeasure amongst the crowd, as to this point, Exhumed Films has only showcased film itself.
This bitter pill put some audience members in such a tizzy that fully half the audience opted to take a longer dinner break rather than sully their film print purism with the possible taint of digital projection. Guys, I get it, you disdain digital and are hardcore print-o-files. There wasn't a print-isn't a print-might never actually be a print of The Dead. You missed a really great zombie flick in the vein of early Romero with some great visuals and even better tension. Name the last zombie film with slow walkers that contained effective, slow building scares.
Now that we're through that, if you're still with me and haven't skipped right to the comments section to explain exactly why you thought dinner at Chili's was more important than a new independent zombie film's Philadelphia premier, let's take a look at exactly what we brave few had seared into our souls. It's important to note that this year's line up consisted only of films that Exhumed has never shown before (with one technical exception). This is a monumental achievement as leading up to this, they've showcased somewhere in the neighborhood of 260 films.
And I know young people today are the visual sort, so accompanying my thoughts on each film is the trailer for it. (mostly because I love trailers so much)
1. Psychomania aka The Death Wheelers - 1973
The psychedelic chic of this odd undead tale was a fantastic way to open the horrorthon's proceedings. With a strange and potent mix of biker road film, satanic pacts, zombies who are no worse for the wear and Bond'esk British styling, Psychomania put us into a hypnotic trance- opening our brain pans, offering space to what we were about to receive.
2. Rodan - 1956
Historically the horrorthon has featured a giant monster movie in the second slot. Nearly any film would face the Sisyphean task of rolling a boulder up the hill that is The Mighty Peking Man (showcased to the delight of all at last year's horrorthon). Rodan radiates 50's giant monster gratification thoughout and is replete with excellent miniature effects - the true star of the film. Slavish devotion was poured into these effects, with stand outs including the ground collapse (in the trailer below) sequence and the volcano sequence. This was an instant time portal to the Saturday afternoons of my youth, which is exactly the time which it played.
3. Frightmare aka The Horror Star - 1983 Frightmare takes the tropes of the Hammer horror subgenre and casts a delightful dance of darkness on it's bones. The resulting floor show is a cornucopia of campy entrapment designed to shake us loose from our comfort food of decades past and casts it in a newer menacing light.
4. Henry: Portrait of a Serial Killer - 1986
Armed with plenty more snacks still at your disposal, you're cruising through Horrothon five without a care in the world. You're high on life, for truly the greatness of all creation can be extrapolated through the medium of film and many are unspooling before your very eyes. And then...yes and then a random, senseless act of remorseless violence is cast unflinchingly across the silver screen. It locks your attention and brings you back to full focus, crashing repeatedly into your sensibilities like a sledge hammer. Maybe you chuckle during the home invasion scene, but it's an unconscious defense mechanism rather than amusement. That's Henry. Here's his trailer.
5. The Dead - 2010
As an enormous zombie fan, I've done the genre six ways from Sunday by this point. Still, gems such as this one have the ability to surprise and delight. The amazing visuals of the wilds of African mid day juxtaposed with ever present encroaching zombie horde creates a deadly beauty. The gun kills can only be described as kinetic in nature, likely a way to cope with budgetary constraints but perhaps a design choice. The Dead is smartly written enough not to have to rely on characters making stupid mistakes to be over come, which is an amazing consideration given the field of zombie material out there. This independent film is rough around the edges but there is so much to like in the bubbling cauldron that even those with a limited interest in the rotting reanimated subgenre book a vacation to Africa.
6. Trick or Treat - 1986
How does one conceptualize this film, when it contains neither tricking nor treating? It's soul has no real basis in Samahin. Instead this is rock metal voyage helmed by copious amounts of denim and Aqua Net, dragging behind its chains and wielding it's devil horns as a warning to all at map's edge: there be entertainment here. Skewing anti-metal culture and metal culture simultaneously, Trick or Treat spins the plates effortlessly and was perfectly placed to kick the tempo back up after the viciousness of Henry and the stark hopelessness of The Dead.
7. Night Warning aka Butcher, Baker, Nightmare Maker - 1983
I'm just going to refer to this as Butcher, Baker, Nightmare Maker since that is by far the superior title. What could you want in a film that this does not have? Crazy lumber beheading car crash? Check. Insane incestuous aunt face licking action? Check. Homophobic cop who invents fictitious gay love triangles on to which he can vent his hatred? Check. Pickled head in a jar? Check. My interest piqued? Check.
8. Frankenhooker - 1990
What would be your course of action if an invention of yours (radio controlled lawn mower) mulched your chubby, pretzel hungry finance into a pile of chipped beef and a head? If the film in which you star is titled Frankenhooker the obvious progression is to feed New York hookers super crack causing them to explode into a rain of diseased limbs from which you constitute a new body for your beloved. Clearly. This fantastic freakshow shares it's sense of humor with the revered Dead Alive and has more tits than you can shake your prick at.
9. Dr.Black and Mr.Hyde aka Decision for Doom - 1976
Stan Winston's transformation effects for the yin-yang flip-flop from black doctor to white murderer are nothing short of astounding. It's astounding that they honestly thought that heavily coating a black man in talcum powder and inserting contacts in his eyes would magically make him appear Caucasian. This trip through blaxploitation land is about par for the course and a welcome part of the horrorthon.
10. Legend of the Wolf Woman aka Naked Werewolf Woman - 1976
Can several erotic flashback sequences bulging with buxom nudity carry a film? They can if the film you're thinking of is Legend of the Wolf Woman, whose lead actress is compelling to look at, which is paramount, since she'll do just about anything to strip down and take fun sized bites out of dudes, almost at random. It's a confusing ride, which never delivers with an actual werewolf, except in the past- where she comes equipped with hairy big toe sized nipples. At this stage in the game, anything to get the blood flowing again is welcome, even if it's bundled with the strings of chest hair attached.
11. Blood Diner - 1987 (released 1990)
This mad cap, silly story of two brothers dedicated to reincarnating the heinous goddess Sheetar with the guidance of their disembodied uncle, who's just a brain and eyes in viscous goop yet retains the power of speech, is oft overlooked for it's silly nature. Truly you would be wasting you time trying to rationalize the finer points of Blood Diner, just trap in and enjoy the blood feast.
12. The Burning - 1981
Did you know Jason Alexander once had a full head of luscious hair? It's true; he wasn't born bald and he played the cool guy. There's lots to love in this fantastic slasher and it was excellently placed to bring back the focus of those attendees who'd gone all sleepy eyed and weak necked. This is arguably Tom Savini's best work and Cropsey is still believably hideous to look upon. I always loved the twist on the well established "last girl" trope becoming "last boy".
13. Maximum Overdrive - 1986
Trust me when I tell you: Once you've been awake for 30 plus hours, you start to see things at the edge of your vision. Things which aren't quite there and on which you can't quite focus. Dodging and leaping from sight the instant you glance at them, you know they're there. Those bastards. If you didn't doze, you're reaching a critical point and pretty much no act of god is going to help you in your quest to remain in the land of the conscious. Nothing that is, but a heaping dose of Emilio Estevez. He's like entertainment crack for your sleep deprived brainstem. Sprinkle him on your spleen. Is Maximum Overdrive a good film? Who cares? It's a shit load of fun.
14. Meet the Feebles - 1989
Power to stay awake fading...Braindrive overload...[Rebooting]...defrag complete. Loading [film recognition software]...reading input "Wingnut films"...processing...
Wait, Wingnut. Isn't that Peter Jackson? Yeah it is. Is this Bad Taste? No, they showed that already. What about Dead/Alive? No, was shown as part of a double feature with Bad Taste. So what could thi...OH MY GOD IT'S MEET THE FEEBLES!
My apologies. I couldn't help but relay exactly what went through my head at roughly 10:30am as the last film of the marathon began to hit my retinas. The way my brain went about working with low cognitive power is a recollection I won't soon forget. What a great, upbeat way to conclude the festivities. If you call muppets on drugs, fucking like bunnies (and in some cases actually fucking bunnies), singing about sodomy and killing each other upbeat. This is a film I never believed I'd see on film. Thank you Exhumed Films.
A few observances:
-This seemed to be the most consistent line up of any Horrorthon- there were no super highs but conversely there were no staggering lows in the film selection either, rather they were all good/great throughout.
-The Cafe in the lobby of the IHouse continues to rule. Biz makes sandwiches that must be some modern day, watered down form of elvish magic, but with meat in them.
-Some of you seriously aren't taking your hygiene concerns seriously. I shouldn't catch a wiff of you strong enough to nearly take me from my feet just from walking by on a trip to the bathroom. Perhaps you're adjusted to the odoriferousness. We aren't, be kind to our noses.
-I'd love to see 7 Exhumed Films 'Greatest hits' and 7 films which have never been shown before. Though I shouldn't say anything since I've loved every line up so far. So I'll just say this: Give me more of whatever you want, EF. You haven't steered me wrong yet.
Halloween is the best time of the year. It's a wonderfully indulgent time, where your inner ghoul is given societal license to be put on display. To celebrate it to it's wicked fullest, the Midnight Cheese will be posting every day in October with excellent ways to enjoy the season. Whether it's horror films, video games, books or activities, check back every day for some new Halloween fun.
Trick 'r' Treat
Trick 'r' Treat, more than any other film, embodies the spirit of Halloween traditions. It's become a modern day cult classic and required Halloween viewing since it's home video release in 2009. Sadly, it was supposed to be a theatrical release in October 2007 and was intended to be the beginnings of a yearly Halloween release but for reasons still unknown Warner Brothers shelved this flick, never giving it a theatrical release. And so, because of this bonehead move, we've only been graced with one entry in this series. But it's cult status has been cemented by these actions and Sam, the spirit of Halloween from the film, has become a cult icon, appearing in commercials for the cable channel FEARnet all year long, counting down the days till their 24 hour Trick 'r' Treat-a-thon today.
For the uninitiated, Trick 'r' Treat is an anthology piece, which tells four macabre tales that are interwoven through various threads. Aside from featuring characters crossing over between stories, there is also the character of Sam, who is the protector of the traditions of Halloween. Sam appears in every tale somewhere and steps in to punish gross tradition violations when needed. The stories are fun and entertaining. This is a horror movie, with plenty of gore and monsters, but it's intention is never to scare you, rather it takes great pains to revel in the spirit and enjoyment of Halloween itself.
It's on FEARNet night now, give it a watch to night while you're giving out candy. You are giving out candy, right? I hope Sam doesn't have to come punish you...
Halloween is the best time of the year. It's a wonderfully indulgent time, where your inner ghoul is given societal license to be put on display. To celebrate it to it's wicked fullest, the Midnight Cheese will be posting every day in October with excellent ways to enjoy the season. Whether it's horror films, video games, books or activities, check back every day for some new Halloween fun.
Halloween
Maybe you thought this would be the film I spotlit for post 31, but while this isn't the best film about the holiday, it is one of most influential horror films of all time. This modestly budgeted film is the father of the modern slasher film and, in a rush to capitalize on a burgeoning craze, ushered in a brand new shift in the horror genre. This is thanks largely to an excellent and tight script, great camera work, a career defining performance from the well established Donald Pleasence and a fortune telling explosion by scream queen to be by Jamie Lee Curtis.
This top grossing independent film of all time is accompanied by director John Carpenter's hypnotic keyboard-synth soundtrack (which just kicked in as I'm writing this) and is the best use of a William Shatner mask ever. You guys know all this, I'm not telling you anything new here.
Halloween has become sacred yearly viewing during the season by horror nerds and has come to be a staple of AMC's Fear Fest. In fact, why are you still reading this? AMC is showing films from the series, starting with the first, all day beginning with the first at 9:30 am.
Start a new tradition or celebrate it again for the 30th time.
Halloween is the best time of the year. It's a wonderfully indulgent time, where your inner ghoul is given societal license to be put on display. To celebrate it to it's wicked fullest, the Midnight Cheese will be posting every day in October with excellent ways to enjoy the season. Whether it's horror films, video games, books or activities, check back every day for some new Halloween fun.
Playing tricks on treaters
I can't be the only person to have disguised themselves as a scarecrow, sat immobile next to the door and waited to scare trick or treating children. Now that I've brought it up, you kinda want to do it too. Be honest. Halloween night is all about the fun you can have. Here are a few cool traditions I celebrate that you might enjoy as well.
As an enormous horror film fan, I'll take any chance I can to expose more folks to the flicks that I love. Luckily, I own an LCD projector. I hang a white bed sheet in my bay window and project films onto it (from the inside). The effect looks really cool and I give any kid who can guess the film double candy. That's the difficult part though, my film selection can't be gory or contain nudity, which in the horror genre ties my hands to mostly black and white features for the 60's on back. Though last year I did show Tremors, which some ghoulish visitor recognized.
Another fun trick to play on treators uses a fog machine to great effect. Take one of your jack o'lanterns, one with a menacing face, and carve an addition hole in the back of it. This hole is to accommodate the fog machine's nozzle. You shoot it as the kids approach for excellent scary effect! One issue may be that this can blow out the candle inside. To combat that use a glow stick instead. Green is especially creepy.
My last tradition is designed to treat the parents in the neighborhood. It's only fair to help them enjoy the evening too. To that end, I hollow out a pumpkin but don't carve a face on it. Instead, I install a small tap in it and fill it with pumpkin beer. Traditionally I fill it with my own homemade pumpkin brew but any you can purchase should have the same effect. It's an excellent treat to offer and most folks are appreciative.
Whatever you particular special Halloween traditions are, celebrate them with gusto!
Halloween is the best time of the year. It's a wonderfully indulgent time, where your inner ghoul is given societal license to be put on display. To celebrate it to it's wicked fullest, the Midnight Cheese will be posting every day in October with excellent ways to enjoy the season. Whether it's horror films, video games, books or activities, check back every day for some new Halloween fun.
Carving Turnips
In keeping with earlier Halloween tradition, as detailed here in our previous day's post, I'm going to hollow out and carve a turnip. If, like me, you've never even seen a turnip before, they're located in the produce section of your grocery store and resemble a fist sized radish, though they're purple and light brown colored. You want a larger rounded one to make for easier carving.
The first thing to do is use a knife to cut the bottom so that it's flat and can sit upright. The cut a flat "lid" off of the top. You'll notice that a turnip is not like a pumpkin inside, in fact it looks more like an onion. For that reason you'll want to carefully use a pairing knife to hollow it out instead of a spoon. Once you've done that, you want to carve a simple traditional pumpkin face onto it. Nothing to complicated since the turnip doesn't have as hardy a surface as a pumpkin and because it's a much smaller canvas.
Place a tea light inside and display your new Jack 'o Lantern with the others. Be prepared to answer questions about as folks might never have seen this specific Halloween tradition before!
Halloween is the best time of the year. It's a wonderfully indulgent time, where your inner ghoul is given societal license to be put on display. To celebrate it to it's wicked fullest, the Midnight Cheese will be posting every day in October with excellent ways to enjoy the season. Whether it's horror films, video games, books or activities, check back every day for some new Halloween fun.
The Legend of Stingy Jack
The roots of our modern day tradition of carving Jack 'o Lanterns are buried in the soil of Ireland with the folk tale of Stingy Jack. There is a horror flick staring Kane Hodder and Tiffany Shepis coming out bearing that name this weekend. Rather than discuss that, I'm going to instead recount the folk tale for you here, as I remember it. It's not overly long (I'm transcribing it from memory here) and is perfect to perform on Halloween night. Share it with your friends and family.
The Legend of Stingy Jack
Stingy Jack was a wicked and deceitful man, who lived in a small town in Ireland several hundred years ago. He loved playing spiteful tricks on innocent folks. He loved drinking himself stupid even more than playing his tricks. Jack never worked a day in his foul life. He filled his belly with food and ale through theft and by manipulating innocent folks.
On a Halloween night much like this one, the townsfolk took to the public house as a means to steady themselves against the cold. As was common, Jack was also there and he was deep into his cup. The Devil, envious of the tales' of Jack's silver tongue and evil ways, joined him at the tavern that night intending to punish the foolish man. Ever the quick thinking, Jack asked if he could drink some ale before departing, offering to buy the second and third rounds if the Devil bought the first.
The Devil was impressed by Jack's suggestion and his calm demeanor facing death. He transformed himself into a coin with which to pay the bartender for two tankards of ale. No sooner had the Devil become a sixpence then did Jack snatch up the coin and place it into his pocket, next to a silver cross he had been carrying. The Devil could not change shape thus trapped and Jack refused to let him go until the Devil agreed not to take his soul for ten years. Begrudgingly the devil relented and was freed, promising not to return for ten years.
Now your or I might use that decade to turn from our wicked ways, hoping that we've time to save our souls from hell. Oh but not old Jack. He continued his wicked ways until one night, as he was walking drunkenly down a country road, he came across the devil himself coming to collect what was due him. Appearing to accept his fate, Jack asked the Devil just one favor before accompanying him to the underworld: "May I have an apple for me rumbling belly? The journey to hell is likely long on an empty stomach". Seeing no reason to deny the request, the Devil foolishly climbed a nearby apple tree to pick one. As he climbed, Jack sprung into action, placing crosses around the base of the tree, thus trapping the furious Devil once again.
This time, Jack made the Devil agree to never take his soul into hell. And having no recourse, the Devil agreed and was set free.
Now life is not long for someone who lives the hard way as Jack did. After some time, he died. His soul approached the gates of Heaven but he was turned away due to his wicked and sinful ways. Rebuffed and downtrodden, Jack approached the Devil to ask if he might be allowed a place in Hell. The Devil, smiling with gleeful malice, proclaimed that he must fulfill his promise to never take Jack's soul into Hell. "But where will I go?!" asked Jack. To make an example of him and to help him find his way back to Earth in the dark, the Devil tossed Jack a single ember straight from the fires of Hell. Jack place this ember into a hollowed out turnip and was doomed to wander the earth until the end of time, never finding rest, with only his Jack o'Lantern to light his way!
Halloween is the best time of the year. It's a wonderfully indulgent time, where your inner ghoul is given societal license to be put on display. To celebrate it to it's wicked fullest, the Midnight Cheese will be posting every day in October with excellent ways to enjoy the season. Whether it's horror films, video games, books or activities, check back every day for some new Halloween fun.
While we slammed the Night of the Demons remake in illuminating you about the amazing and little known The Convent, it occurs to me that we've yet to speak on the original. And since it takes place on Halloween there is no better time to tackle it.
Our adventure does take place on All Hallows Eve, where a group of horny teens plan to hold a costume party at Hull House. And what a location it is! It's got the perfect trifecta of "you gonna die" signs, which our intrepid teens completely ignore: 1) Abandoned 2) Former funeral parlor 3) build on "evil" land. Yup, it's going to be a special night. Of course, shit hits the fan when one of the young ladies is possessed by a demon and begins spreading the infection by killing her former friends (and doing a long- drawn out- sexy dance).
As this is the late 80's, there's a good mix of comedy in with the scares and there's also plenty of gore. The kills are creative and, in some cases, hysterical. There's also a really weird scene with Linnea Quigly's boobs which you shouldn't miss. The camp factor adds to the fun with 80's fashions, lingo and musical stylings- part of what should scare you since kids are dressing this way again. Perhaps parents should show their kids 80's horror films as a PSA against wearing mommy jeans? It wasn't cool the first time through, kids.
Anyway, Night of the Demons is a great ride which has everyone covered whether you like gore, cheese, scares, laughs or too much eyeliner. And sex, it's got plenty of sex. Check it out, it's much better than the remake.
Halloween is the best time of the year. It's a wonderfully indulgent time, where your inner ghoul is given societal license to be put on display. To celebrate it to it's wicked fullest, the Midnight Cheese will be posting every day in October with excellent ways to enjoy the season. Whether it's horror films, video games, books or activities, check back every day for some new Halloween fun.
Costume Quest
What gives a video game the pedigree to be called the literal embodiment of all things Halloween? Is that even possible to confer upon an interactive experience? If we agree that this is within the realm of possibility, for which of it's qualities did I decided to go in this direction? The sum total of all it's qualities, of course.
Costume Quest was released last Halloween season by developer Double Fine, in a bite sized downloadable format and at a reasonable price ($15). Double Fine is a studio known for their immense wit and eclectic, charming games. In Costume Quest they manage to distill down the childhood wonder of everyone's (who counts) favorite holiday into an interactive journey that anyone could enjoy. By no stretch of the imagination is the combat gameplay overly difficult- it isn't supposed to be- it is engaging though. The narrative and the nostalgia are the main draws here.
The story has you taking on the role of one of two twins, Reynold (a boy) and Wren (a girl). New to the neighborhood, whichever of the siblings you choose is tasked with walking their twin around to trick or treat. You are costumed as a blue cardboard box robot and your sibling is adorned as a giant piece of candy corn. As fate would have it, a group of marauding monsters called "Grubbins" are ransacking homes and stealing all the candy to bring back to their own world. Your brother or sister is mistaken for the biggest piece of candy ever and kidnapped. It's then your mission to save them any way you can (or mom and dad will totally kill you!). In your quest you'll gather a party of likewise costumed children and battle an assortment of villainous monsters across several landscapes.
How can a few kids in rudimentary costumes fight these grubbins? Through the magic of Halloween! When combat commences the costumes transform from crummy arts and crafts to the embodiment of the imaginative creature they represent. So the default cardboard robot costume becomes a 50 foot tall robot warrior, replete with missiles and a rocket powered punch. Each costume has it's own special attack and role in combat, which is turn based and very reminiscent of older (read: better) Final Fantasy games. And there are plenty of monsters/animals/heroes to choose from. In your travels you'll come across costume patterns and must collect the pieces that make them up to unlock them for use.
The overworld which you'll be exploring is a rich tapestry woven with equal parts snark and nostalgia. There are items to collect, kids playing hide and seek to find, houses to trick or treat at (the in game currency is candy) and Halloween festivities to explore. Bobbing for apples is one way to earn experience (xp) and unique items. You can barter your collected candy for battle stamps, which confer special holiday themed benefits in combat. There are also special, Garbage Pail-esk cards which you can collect and trade with other kids.
There's a lot of content here, all of it a loving glance back at the Halloween experiences of your childhood. This game is so excellent that all fans of Halloween need apply. Lucky for you, it's become available on the PC via Steam, so you can experiences it even if you don't have an Xbox 360 or Playstation 3. It's not overly long, clocking in between 5-10 hours. You've never played a game that's celebrated the holiday this much. It's a love letter to Halloween and you are missing out if you've never experienced it.
Halloween is the best time of the year. It's a wonderfully indulgent time, where your inner ghoul is given societal license to be put on display. To celebrate it to it's wicked fullest, the Midnight Cheese will be posting every day in October with excellent ways to enjoy the season. Whether it's horror films, video games, books or activities, check back every day for some new Halloween fun.
The Hazing
In preparing a list of topics to discuss for this month long count down, I was bound to come across titles which I had just simply missed out on and was unfamiliar with. In googling for films which take place on Halloween, one in particular caught my attention. I don't know what it was about The Hazing that stopped me from passing it by, but if I'm being honest with myself it was likely the hot girl(Nectar Rose) in the playboy bunny costume wielding a chainsaw on the cover.
What I watched was a rough amalgamation between Evil Dead, House on Haunted Hill (1999) and Night of the Demons with a lot of flair and tons of style. Your basic plots follows five pledges, three guys and two girls, who are participating in cross fraternity/sorority scavenger hunt event. The plan is for them to all meet up in the old creepy house with their collected items, where their pledge masters are waiting with a bunch of gimmicky scares. Of course, things go from wacky teenage hijinx to "oh my god is that my spleen?" faster than you can say "oh my god that IS my spleen!".
Tiffany Shepis is excellent as one of the pledges. I get the impression that she was given license to really have a great time with the role and she certain does steal a lot of the scenes she's in, hamming it up. Nectar Rose also shines as another one of the pledges who does not react to shit hitting the fan at all how you would have expected. Most of the male leads are unremarkable, except for Brad Dourif as Professor Kapps, whos research into occult rituals and human sacrifice is what sets our whole ride into motion.
While it is now out of print, you can watch The Hazing (aka Dead Scared) on Netflix's instant streaming service. That's where I came across it. It's hard to find Halloween movies that are this much fun. You'd think there'd be more, given how much horror fans love the holiday. Here's one more, at least, to add to your list.
Halloween is the best time of the year. It's a wonderfully indulgent time, where your inner ghoul is given societal license to be put on display. To celebrate it to it's wicked fullest, the Midnight Cheese will be posting every day in October with excellent ways to enjoy the season. Whether it's horror films, video games, books or activities, check back every day for some new Halloween fun.
Hocus Pocus
"I put a spell on you and now you're mine"
This fun Halloween adventure film from Disney put a spell on me as a youth. You could easily write it off for any number of reasons without ever giving it so much as a chance. "It has Bet Midler" in it- so what? She chews up the scenery in such hammy fashion that you could sell her at the deli counter. "It also costars Sarah Jessica Parker"- Yeah but this is before she was annoying and she clearly has an excellent time in her role as the ditsy witch sister. "BUT IT'S FROM DISNEY!" So are Nation Treasure, Sky High and the Pirates of the Caribbean films. Are you done now? Can I stop debunking your doubts and move on to why you should watch Hocus Pocus?
Thanks.
Fun, adventure filled films seem to be a dying breed. Much lauded classics of the genre were a mainstay of the 80's and a holdover in the early 90's. Hocus Pocus came out in 1993 and fused the adventure film with a huge helping of Halloween flavor. It does take the easy road by setting itself in Salem, Massachusetts - but the film makers takes the standard tropes and do an excellent job mixing in some new twists.
The Sanderson sisters (Midler, Parker and Kathy Najimy) are a trio of wicked witches living in a cottage in the woods near in Salem. Our story begins in 1693, with the aged sisters preparing a potion which will restore their youth by stealing it from children. Young Thackery Binx fails to save his sister from this fate and is cursed by the witches into the form of an immortal cat (who can speak). Shortly on the heels of all this spell slinging, the villagers arrive and convict the witches to be hanged. Just before they can be, Winifred (Midler) recites a spell which will allow them to be revived if ever a black candle is lit by a virgin on Halloween.
From here we flash forward to present day, with our protagonist Max, who hates Halloween, is forced to take his sister trick or treating. As you can imagine, in hanging out with the girl he's crushing on at the town's witch museum, Max lights the candle and unknowingly bring the Sanderson Sisters back to life. What follows is a fun chase all around town and the witches need their spell book back to absorb Max's sisters life force before the sun rises. Binx, in cat form, guide the kids in the quest to beat the Sandersons.
There's a lot to love packed in here. The fish out of water nature of witches encountering modern technology and misunderstanding it is hysterical. Watching as Winifred begins to catch on and use the technology to her advantage - specifically the scene where she mixes magic and technology to curse all of the town children's parents to dance until they die - shows that she's not just the one dimensional antagonist that she could have easily been made into. There's a fun zombie played by an unknown Doug Jones (Abe Sapien of Hellboy fame) that's unlike nearly all shambler portrayals as you think of them. Of course, the Salem/witch historical aspect is really cool too, even though it's extremely inaccurate.
Of course the nature of Hocus Pocus means that the perfect time of year to check it out is right around the witching season. If you've seen it, you know what I'm talking about and if you haven't then drop a few preconceived notions and check it out.
